In a relationship wherein one half of the couple has dysautonomia, a condition that the medical world cannot fully understand or cure, it is not only that person who’s having a hard time. Their healthy significant other suffers as well, but not because he or she feels tired to care for the ill spouse. The most likely reason is that it is difficult for them to see the love of their life go through such misery and never have the means to take away their pain.
This is about increasing your own awareness of how you think, what you do when you are stressed, anxious, depressed, in pain. — Robert Taibbi L.C.S.W.
If you can identify with that circumstance, please don’t bother to hide it. Every loving individual will feel that way, especially when their husband or wife’s disease is recurring. However, what isn’t true is the thought that you cannot ever help your spouse deal with the health issue.
Check out the tips on how to support your better half during their battle against dysautonomia down below.
Inquire
The first thing that you need to remember is that you can always ask your spouse concerning their mood that day or whatever you do not understand about the disease. You should never be afraid to do that, thinking that it might hurt his or her emotions. Your unwillingness to ask questions may even make them assume that you do not care, which isn’t a terrible lingering idea for couples.
Listen
In case you have a talkative husband or wife, you will not have difficulty in letting them realize that they can talk to you about everything they are feeling. That person will do it without much prompting, no worries. However, if your better half is usually silent regarding the illness, and then he or she speaks up all of a sudden, you ought to listen to him or her well. It is the only way for you to figure out what’s going on in their head before, during, and after a painful episode.
Transforming one’s thoughts will ultimately result in positive actions and behaviors in difficult moments. — Greta Gleissner LCSW
Plan
Most chronic diseases luckily take some days off too. Meaning, there will be times in which you can both act as if neither of you has a disorder that keeps on coming back and go on adventures together. To make such occasions extra memorable, therefore, you should plan what places you will visit or what activities you will try months or weeks before that.
Support
Last but not the least, support your significant other in any way possible. If he or she wants to try a new activity, say yes to it. If there’s a blockbuster movie he or she wishes to watch, go for it. Moreover, in times of ordeal, though the spouse may not want you to see him or her in that state, ensure that they know you are around whenever they need anything.
Some persons have good enough executive function that they can quickly mobilze CBT strategies and keep arousal from rising to the point where their cognition is overwhelmed. — Tom Bunn L.C.S.W.
When you have a till-death-do-us-part type of relationship with your spouse, there is virtually nothing that can stop you from being there for him or her through thick and thin. Sometimes you may argue or get frustrated with each other, but that is normal for any married couple. What matters is that you will not leave your better half during their fight against a chronic illness like dysautonomia.